Friday, January 20, 2012

Lauren's Law

Hi America. Y'all remember Lauren Spierer, right? Her face is plastered over half of Bloomington right now.

I don't have anything against this girl. I hope they find her someday. I hope they find that black guy missing from Bedford, too, but nobody seems to care about that. Anyhow I want to talk a little bit about the mindset of this modern citizenry that views government as the solution instead of the problem.

You can find my harping point today on along with all the other sewage-Lauren's Law Petition

So yeah. 3,500 motherfuckers are okay with the government hooking you up to a brain scanning machine without a warrant or a trial in the case of a missing person. Leaving aside the efficacy of both Online Petitions and Polygraph Machines, what the fuck is wrong with these people? I mean I'm sure none of them have read Isaac Asimov's The Singing Bells or Phillip K. Dick's Minority Report, so maybe they aren't looking at this law with an eye for the future-but I'm a nerd, motherfucker, and I see nothing but horror in this concept.

Sometime, maybe 2099 or so, they are going to develop a psychic probe machine. And thanks to this law, there has been a legal precedent for them to brain probe you without a warrant or a trial since 2012.

I'm sorry, but I just don't think 17 year olds read much anymore-and even if they do, they don't touch on these concepts much in Twilight, do they?


  1. Wow, you ain't shittin'. Those comments are some of the best insight into the minds of modern people, ever. Of course, that's using the word "mind" pretty loosely, and maybe even the word "people."

    "Please help me; I can't figure out how to live." Where the hell are a zoo or an asylum?

  2. I agree. Now combine that bullshit with this:
    New York Moves to Deploy Body Scanners on Street in Search for Guns
    "Terahertz Imaging Detection measures energy radiating from the body up to 16 feet away and can detect anything blocking it."

  3. Chill, anon; I'm sure it's a great long-term plan. You just take all the bodies, turn them into corpses, line 'em up down Broadway and remove all the contraband. Finally, Peace on Earth. Who's against Peace on Earth?

    Even better, it'll only take one boss and a few thousand workers. Man, will those guys be rich and happy.