Tuesday, June 29, 2010

A Blog About Pooping

I have in my possession a book that I gave Grandpapa not too long before he died; it is called the Outhouse Papers, by Wayne Erbsen. It is much less dirty than it sounds; it is just a book of facts and Trivia, presumably calculated to the reading speed of the average pooper. I'm not really a toilet reader myself; to me it makes more sense to get in, poop, and then get away from the place where the poop was. (Like Spider Jerusalem, sometimes my poops have to be killed with a shovel) But the book is a good read regardless; I kind of want to read some of the guy's other books. He's just a random banjo playing folklorist that writes touristy drivel but his collection looks impressive.

Here's my favorite joke from this book.

After a long trial the judge came to a decision in a case between a farmer and a railroad company who had hit one of his prize bulls earlier in the week. (Presumably in that America it was actually possible to see the inside of a courtrom in a week. -Your Beloved Editor) The settlement came to half the value of the bull.

In the elevator after the trial the railroad company lawyer and the farmer shared an elevator. The lawyer gloated "Old man, you've just been had. The engineer was asleep at the wheel and the fireman was drunk in the caboose. I just bluffed you."

The farmer grinned and said "Well, sonny, I had my doubts about winnin' this case too, when that bull come wanderin' up to the house this mornin."
Not a bad book on the whole although I think he might have been running out of material at some point; the book advertises itself as country humor and trivia, but then it has an animal facts section that includes camels and elephants and dung beetles and shit. And I mean animal facts are great, but I don't get the connection. There are two kinds of animals to a redneck-light meat and dark meat. All other facts are, indeed, too trivial to be trivia.
Trivial musings aside...


Hey, the title says a blog about pooping. You clicked it, you sick fuck.

Heh heh heh. Poop.

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